This week, I have found myself feeling unhappy, down, sad, lonely...just about any description of the darker side of one's emotions. I could have cried at any moment. Why? No reason that I can think of. For two days I struggled with these feelings. They made me feel unspiritual, inadequate...lacking. I kept thinking, "What is wrong with me???"
Yesterday on my way home from work, I inserted Travis Cottrell's "Beloved Disciple" cd into my player...and hit 4 or 5. I do not even know the name of this song, but I listened again, and again, and again...singing at the top of my voice...
I have found Your love feeds my soul... I have found Your love feeds my soul... You're better than life, so I'll glorify You... Spirit within me, cry out Your Name... I have found Your love feeds my soul. (I'm not even sure these are the correct words, but these are what I heard.)
When I got home...I inserted the cd in my kitchen player...and went to get the mail. I piddled around for some time while Jay moved a huge fallen limb and took care of the weekly yard work.
Some time later, I noticed it - my unhappy, down, sad feelings were gone! Believe it or not, I had spent time daily in my devotional guide, my Bible, praying and journaling as usual. What made the difference? PRAISE...praise that touched me deeply within, waking that gratitude and awareness of Who Jesus is and all He is to me every day.
Later, I went to the piano and spent time playing and praising...my mood was light and peace filled my soul again. I truly have found His love feeds my soul...even when I don't know what's missing. Proof we can be "in the Word"..."on the pew", and still drift away. Nothing we can "do" fills us up...HE feeds my soul, gives me peace...and joy.
He instructs us to praise Him...not for His benefit, but for OURS.
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